“We want to retain the centre. We want to know what is happening and what will be happening. We want to know in advance how to use what will happen. We want a blueprint, a plan. We would like to see a model. That is not possible in the realm of Silence, in the realm of total relaxation. Therefore there is a basic resistance to the unconditional relinquishing the whole or the grip of the thought structure, the mind, the self, the me. If we are honest with ourselves, mercilessly, ruthlessly honest with ourselves, we will confess to ourselves that we are afraid of Silence. We are afraid of emptiness.
When the manipulated manager, the ego, the self, disappears from the centre and when the Divinity, the Wholeness, the supreme cosmic intelligence takes over, then what will happen to me, to my family, to my business, to my job? We are afraid of that. We are afraid of Silence. We are afraid of Freedom. We are infatuated intellectually, with the idea of Emancipation, Moksha, but we are afraid to leave the protective security of the known, the knowledge, the knowing, the past, the experiencing, experiences, memory. It is a protective enclosure in which we would create an order, a harmony. We will use it properly, not mishandle it – all that is agreeable to us. So there seems to be a basic schizophrenic division somewhere within us. On the one hand an intellectual fascination, even infatuation, for the idea of unconditional freedom and on the other hand, a reluctance to leave the nest of protective security. We get caught up between the two. If we are properly educated, then there would be no Avidya, no ignorance about the nature of Life of which you are an expression, of which you are an emanation, as the ray of sunlight emanates from the sun and merges back into it in the evening. We are emanations of that Wholeness and are bound to merge back into it. If there is ignorance about this, if this basic Avidya is there, then there will be a wrong identification which is called Asmita, Deha Asmita. Then we identify ourselves with the physical and psychological structure. We want to live in it, sophisticate its movement. That identification with the physical and the psychological structure and all the conditionings fed into it, generate … attachment, contempt, hatred etc.”
Vimala Thakar – From “EGO – Emergence and Merging Back of the ‘I’ Process.”